Dear Jackson,

I want to protect you from all harm, but since I can’t I’ll teach you to get back up and try again.

I want to keep you from heartache, but since I can’t I’ll teach you that while you cannot control the actions of others you can control how you react and no one’s words or actions determine who you are.

I want to be brave and strong so you will have the example that you deserve, but when I’m not I’ll show you that when I'm weak HE is strong, and when I’m afraid He is my comforter.

I want to do my part to mold you into a loving, hardworking, strong, Godly man, but when you fall short (and we all do, my precious son) I want you to know I am so proud of you and wouldn’t trade you for the world.

When you are older and despite our pleadings you make decisions that we prayed you wouldn’t, know that we’ll love you forever and there is NOTHING, EVER that could change that.

I wish that we’d always agree and get along, but since we won’t I’ll remind you (and myself) that my job is to protect and guide you, not to be liked.

I wish I could tell you that times would always be easy, that people would always be kind and that life would be fair, but since I can’t I’ll assure you that God is good. Cling to Him and all else will fall into place.

While I feel my love for you could move mountains, it’s all-consuming and intoxicating- it’s nothing compared to the LOVE of Jesus.

I (selfishly) wish I could tell you that I’d always be able to carry you, that we’d always play in the rain and feed the ducks, that while still in our pajamas we’d laugh until we had tears over your storybooks, or sing songs at the top of our lungs at the park.

I wish I could tell you that my kisses would always have healing powers and bubbles would always be magical, but since I can’t I want you to know this: you are one of God’s greatest gifts in my life, sweet Jackson. Never, ever forget how much you are loved.

Seeing this when I walk in a room lights up my life.

I love you to the moon, and BACK!

Playing in the Rain

The rain woke Jackson from his nap today. He wanted to go outside so badly but I told him we had to wait until there was no thunder or lightning and it wasn't raining so hard.

So, he waited.

Finally he screamed, "Mommy, little bit!" (As in, it's only raining a little bit.)

So, out we went.

Which made one very happy, wet little boy.

Look at my rock!

I think moments like these I'll remember forever. :)

A Day at the Farm

Today Jackson, Aunt Leah and I went to the farm. We had so much fun. I had trouble choosing which pictures to post, so here's a ton. :)

Homemade Laundry Detergent

I cannot tell you how fast and easy it is to make your own laundry detergent! This is my second time to make the following recipe and my last batch lasted our family FIFTEEN months. In my experience it cleans just as well as the store bought variety. I highly recommend it. Not only does it make me feel like June Cleaver, it also washes my clothes for pennies a load!

Here's the recipe I use (Thanks, Duggar Family!), along with a pictorial play-by-play:

Homemade Liquid Laundry Soap

4 Cups - hot tap water
1 Fels-Naptha soap bar
1 Cup - Arm & Hammer Super Washing Soda
½ Cup Borax

- Grate bar of soap and add to saucepan with water. Stir continually over medium-low heat until soap dissolves and is melted.

-Fill a 5 gallon bucket half full of hot tap water. Add melted soap, washing soda and Borax. Stir well until all powder is dissolved. Fill bucket to top with more hot water. Stir, cover and let sit overnight to thicken.

-Stir and fill a used, clean, laundry soap dispenser half full with soap and then fill rest of way with water. Shake before each use. (will gel)

-Optional: You can add 10-15 drops of essential oil per 2 gallons. Add once soap has cooled. Ideas: lavender, rosemary, tea tree oil.

-Yield: Liquid soap recipe makes 10 gallons.

-Top Load Machine- 5/8 Cup per load (Approx. 180 loads)

-Front Load Machines- ¼ Cup per load (Approx. 640 loads)

I found all of the ingredients, minus the lavender, on the aisle with the laundry detergent at Wal-Mart for less than I would spend on a container of detergent. (The washing soda and borax will make multiple batches of this recipe.)