My Calling

For as long as I can remember I wanted to be a teacher. I remember bribing the neighborhood kids to play school with me when I was in elementary school. I walked downtown the the teacher supply store with my allowances and turned the spare room off the garage into a pretty impressive little classroom. I was made to teach. I love it. It was my calling.

No part of me planned to stay home with Jackson. I loved my job. Why would I quit? I couldn't answer that question until after I held him. Then I knew. I couldn't sleep imagining going back to work. My heart was breaking. I didn't want to miss a second- not.one.second. After many tears, prayers, and number crunching sessions- I resigned. Part of me feared I would regret it. What in the world would I do all day? What if I was miserable?

I followed my heart anyway. I am SO glad I did. I wouldn't trade one second of this time with this boy for anything. I thank God that His plan was so much greater than mine. As many sweet friends saw their babies off to kindergarten today, wiping their tears as they pulled out of the car line I realized in the blink of an eye that will be my baby and those will be my tears. Thank goodness we have four more years!

So today we had a "Not Back to School" celebration-Jackson and Mommy style. First on the agenda: J shaped pancakes.

After reading books, singing songs and staying in our pajamas for entirely too long I couldn't help myself and we did some crafts.
How can I miss teaching when I get to do it everyday with the most adorable student I've ever had?
I was wrong about my calling. This is it...

Jackson's First Haircut

For nearly a year and a half I wondered if Jackson would need a haircut before he started kindergarten. Alas, my once completely bald baby needed his first haircut. I held onto the curls for as long as I could. I finally realized that I had three options: a haircut, a ponytail or some cut-off shorts and boots. The haircut won.

Before

Jackson did a fabulous job!

I love this curl! I have twirled it around my finger each day for months.

It has a new home in his baby book now.

After

My handsome, big boy.

Summer Time

Sorry it has been so long since my last post. Instead of trying to catch you up on everything, I'll share some of the highlights.

Most importantly, we finished our journey through the bible in May and it was an amazing experience. It will change your life, I promise. I'm thirsty for more and plan to begin another journey shortly. If you're still reading, don't give up. You CAN do this and you will be so glad you did!

I just glanced through my pictures from the last month and a half (if you know me, you know that took a while) and chose some of my favorites.

Father's Day

Jackson transitioned to his "big boy bed" last week. I wanted to cry. It's funny because I talked to a friend a few weeks ago and told her we'd probably keep him in his crib until he was three. I was shocked when after a nap he looked at me and said " climb out" and did. *Gasp* That was his last nap in his crib.

I was dreading night time. Not only was this transition yet another reminder that my baby is fading away but he also was running a fever and fighting a cold this day. I imagined lots of tears and putting him back to bed at least 47 times.

It was amazing, I still can't believe it. I bought him an Ernie doll as a surprise for being a big boy and told him his job was to stay in the bed with Ernie because he could not get out of bed. It worked. I heard him talking the next morning and went in to find him sitting straight up jabbering away. When he saw me he said, "Get out, please?" when I said yes he hopped out. I was in awe. Surely nap time would be a disaster. Nope. Just as easy. Hallelujah!
Jackson is very excited about becoming a big boy. This picture cracks me up. We're not training yet but he does ask to tee-tee in the potty occasionally (and does!). I plan on doing the "Three Day Potty Training Method" next month. Wish me luck! (I'm sure you'll read more about this experience later.)

After two years of growing I had enough hair to donate this month!

We had a great time at the beach house last week.

Dear Jackson,

I want to protect you from all harm, but since I can’t I’ll teach you to get back up and try again.

I want to keep you from heartache, but since I can’t I’ll teach you that while you cannot control the actions of others you can control how you react and no one’s words or actions determine who you are.

I want to be brave and strong so you will have the example that you deserve, but when I’m not I’ll show you that when I'm weak HE is strong, and when I’m afraid He is my comforter.

I want to do my part to mold you into a loving, hardworking, strong, Godly man, but when you fall short (and we all do, my precious son) I want you to know I am so proud of you and wouldn’t trade you for the world.

When you are older and despite our pleadings you make decisions that we prayed you wouldn’t, know that we’ll love you forever and there is NOTHING, EVER that could change that.

I wish that we’d always agree and get along, but since we won’t I’ll remind you (and myself) that my job is to protect and guide you, not to be liked.

I wish I could tell you that times would always be easy, that people would always be kind and that life would be fair, but since I can’t I’ll assure you that God is good. Cling to Him and all else will fall into place.

While I feel my love for you could move mountains, it’s all-consuming and intoxicating- it’s nothing compared to the LOVE of Jesus.

I (selfishly) wish I could tell you that I’d always be able to carry you, that we’d always play in the rain and feed the ducks, that while still in our pajamas we’d laugh until we had tears over your storybooks, or sing songs at the top of our lungs at the park.

I wish I could tell you that my kisses would always have healing powers and bubbles would always be magical, but since I can’t I want you to know this: you are one of God’s greatest gifts in my life, sweet Jackson. Never, ever forget how much you are loved.

Seeing this when I walk in a room lights up my life.

I love you to the moon, and BACK!

Playing in the Rain

The rain woke Jackson from his nap today. He wanted to go outside so badly but I told him we had to wait until there was no thunder or lightning and it wasn't raining so hard.

So, he waited.

Finally he screamed, "Mommy, little bit!" (As in, it's only raining a little bit.)

So, out we went.

Which made one very happy, wet little boy.

Look at my rock!

I think moments like these I'll remember forever. :)

A Day at the Farm

Today Jackson, Aunt Leah and I went to the farm. We had so much fun. I had trouble choosing which pictures to post, so here's a ton. :)

Homemade Laundry Detergent

I cannot tell you how fast and easy it is to make your own laundry detergent! This is my second time to make the following recipe and my last batch lasted our family FIFTEEN months. In my experience it cleans just as well as the store bought variety. I highly recommend it. Not only does it make me feel like June Cleaver, it also washes my clothes for pennies a load!

Here's the recipe I use (Thanks, Duggar Family!), along with a pictorial play-by-play:

Homemade Liquid Laundry Soap

4 Cups - hot tap water
1 Fels-Naptha soap bar
1 Cup - Arm & Hammer Super Washing Soda
½ Cup Borax

- Grate bar of soap and add to saucepan with water. Stir continually over medium-low heat until soap dissolves and is melted.

-Fill a 5 gallon bucket half full of hot tap water. Add melted soap, washing soda and Borax. Stir well until all powder is dissolved. Fill bucket to top with more hot water. Stir, cover and let sit overnight to thicken.

-Stir and fill a used, clean, laundry soap dispenser half full with soap and then fill rest of way with water. Shake before each use. (will gel)

-Optional: You can add 10-15 drops of essential oil per 2 gallons. Add once soap has cooled. Ideas: lavender, rosemary, tea tree oil.

-Yield: Liquid soap recipe makes 10 gallons.

-Top Load Machine- 5/8 Cup per load (Approx. 180 loads)

-Front Load Machines- ¼ Cup per load (Approx. 640 loads)

I found all of the ingredients, minus the lavender, on the aisle with the laundry detergent at Wal-Mart for less than I would spend on a container of detergent. (The washing soda and borax will make multiple batches of this recipe.)